Z-Pac

I went to the doc yesterday. He diagnosed bronchitis... which I pretty much had figured out as I lay in bed gasping for a breath. I got a course of azithromycin and I am feeling better already. I went back to work today - yay! Staying at home when you are sick is NO FUN. I was so ready to go back to work today.

So, I was perusing the internet today and remembered that there is a race on my birthday this year! It is called Rudolph's Revenge - December 15 - my 56th birthday. I will see how the training goes when I get back on my feet to see if I am going to go for a 5 K or a 10 K. That logo is so dang cute, I bet the shirt is cute. And how can you resist running a race on your 56th birthday? Oh, yeah, most of you are not even old enough to be my children... well, some day you will be old and gray and you will be looking forward to running races in your sunset years!

Until then... have a great day.

Resolution Run

I have just resolved that I will participate in the Resolution Run on New Year's Eve! It starts at 6:00 p.m. and runs around Washington Park. Afterwards there will be pizza!

I think I did this race the first year they had it, back in the early or mid-nineties. It was downtown that year and I think it started way later at night. It was fun. I thought it was a great way to see out an old year and usher in a new one.

I am so desperately ill that I have made an appointment to see my physician in about an hour. Believe me, this is sick! I don't like to go in for a "cold". But I have felt progressively worse each day since Wednesday. I have now missed 2 days of work, and I hope to miss no more. I don't even have a voice anymore and I look like hell!

I miss the me I see evidence of all over this house. The Runners World magazines, the books about how to run a marathon scattered about, the runners shoes, the high heels, the garmin, the iPod, etc. I feel like I am a hundred years old and will never run again. Oh- how I can't wait to get out there again and be a healthy alive person!

Sad Movie

Sick Again!

This is getting old! I am at home sick again today. I have a fever, a headache, a sore throat, and body aches. I missed two days of work last month because of this same kind of crap.

So, I was sleeping and the phone kept ringing. Why does everyone need my old clothes, shoes, and furniture? I am on the no call list for sales calls, but it seems there are just as many calls for charity. Now, don't get the idea I am not charitable, because I do have my charities... but I don't want the fricking phone to ring all day long.

I did what any reasonable person would do in this situation... I got out of bed and made popcorn and the candy sauce for caramel corn. It is now in the oven and in a minute, I will be chowing down on wonderful, hot, homemade caramel corn. And then in a half hour, I will be wondering how I can ever get my diet back under control.

I have a knitting workshop to attend tomorrow. I really hope I can go. I have paid in advance, I have even purchased special yarn and needles for it.

No running today, no running yesterday. I hope I can get back on my feet soon.

Lazy Bones

I haven't posted at all because I haven't worked out at ALL. Not one bit since Friday last week! Holy Cow. I guess I will pretend I am taking seriously the rule of thumb about taking one day off for each mile run in a race. So by Sunday I better get back to it!

Big Huge Deal at work this week. It is over now. I am so tired. I am taking a vacation the week of November 5 - and doing NOTHING.

I waited (and didn't take a vacation) all summer for this Big Huge Deal at work because it was due sometime in July or August. But didn't happen until the end of October. That is OK. It is over now.

I have spent any money that might have been used for a vacation on
1. new garage door
2. new lighting fixtures in my house
3. 4 new tires on my car - that is painful money to spend!

So I will spend a week contemplating and knitting and whatever the heck else I feel like doing!

Restored!

Phew! The retreat was just what I needed. There is no real reason for this picture being here except that it was taken this morning... and clearly, I am NOT 300 lbs.... When I came home from the retreat, I checked the race site for the photos and oh my goodness. I never want to see THAT again! I knew that the soaking wet insane clothing I was wearing was not going to be flattering, but I had no idea I would look like I weigh 400 lbs.

So I ran on Friday morning and it was good. I walked about a mile yesterday morning and again this morning. At 8700 feet elevation. It was nice, I even ran a bit, but you can definitely feel the elevation up there.
I took this photo of the chapel this morning. It was snowing and absolutely beautiful! To sit in the chapel last night was really moving. The whole thing was just wonderful!

I got a bit of perspective on my life while I was away. I am going to change a few things... none of which are germane to this blog. But I MUST slow down. I cannot hurry from the time I wake up till the time I pass out at night. I must be more mindful of what I am doing, and probably do a bit less.

I will probably head back to the gym to the treadmill and start doing some faster miles... 2 or 3 miles at a time. I think it will improve my fitness.

I need to face the fact that I have gained about 7 lbs. over the last year of training for half-marathons. 7 lbs makes a difference in the way a person feels and looks. I think getting back on the treadmill and just not eating like a glutton will get that weight off.

I stopped at the store on my way home and bought a chicken, celery, onion, and carrots - it is now all simmering in a pot and will be soup soon. This is a cheap and easy way to eat decently for as long as I can stand it. And then still have some in the freezer.

It is cold and snowy - The Broncos play the Steelers at home tonight. The ski resorts pray for nationally televised Broncos games where it snows - it increases their business exponentially. Maybe tonight will be one of those games.

Have a great remainder of your weekend everyone....

The Depression...

Showed up right on time. I wish the race photos were as reliable! No photos yet. I don't know why I care, because they are sure to be not so good.

I am leaving tomorrow for a weekend retreat in the mountains. It is sponsored by my Biblical School. I am greatly looking forward to it. I think the timing could not be better.

I am really depressed. I am sure I will be back to normal (whatever that is) within days, but for now, I am not having fun. I have been locked up in my office almost all week - closing my office door so I don't start swearing at people I just can't seem to tolerate suddenly. Thank God I have the ability to close my office door....

I haven't been out for a run yet since the race. The weather's been bad - and the lack of light is a huge factor. The other morning I was going to run, but I looked out the window at 6:00 a.m., and thought - no thank you, I am not running in the pitch black morning.

I am planning on running tomorrow before I leave for my retreat. I am sure it will feel quite good. Then I have to figure out what to do for a fitness plan. I went shopping tonight after work - who can go for a religious retreat without a new outfit? - and found that my normal size is tight. In fact, I bought a larger size because I do not want to deal with tight pants. Not even snug. I can deal with loose pants, and that is about it.

I should also be able to get a hike or two when I am in the mountains this weekend. It should be beautiful. I am sure to get over this funk-a-delic mood I am in.

Tuesday after the race

I was hoping for some race photos by now, but they still aren't posted. I am sure they will be doozies! At one point, I was running, pretty much alone, and saw two cameras pointed at me. Well, my bib was under two layer of clothing I planned to ditch but never did. So, I did what any red-blooded American girl would do... I unzipped my jacket and lifted up one shirt to show my bib! I am sure I looked like some kind of waterlogged deranged exhibitionist.

I was expecting the heavy dark cloud of depression to hit this afternoon. The Tuesday afternoon after my last HM was brutal. But I feel fine... thank God.

I do have a sense of unease - I have been training for something since January 1. I don't think I want to train for anything right now, but I feel sort of aimless. I will probably get out and take a little easy 3 mile run tomorrow.

That is hilarious! In August 2003, I decided to start running and I started with 5 minutes of running. 5 minutes was all I could take. And then after a week or two, I increased it to 10 minutes. Once I did ten minutes, I knew I could do a mile. I ran a mile for months before I increased it to a mile and a half. I remember the first time I ran 3 miles - well, the first time since I was in my 30s.... it was July 28, 2004.

So now I am nearly 56 years old and talking about taking a "little easy 3 mile run" - three days after a half-marathon. Life is good. It is really, really good.

Some Half-Marathon Stats

The times were posted yesterday afternoon:
I finished in 3:09:24
Which is 5:21 faster than my last HM
My pace was 14:27
My fastest mile was the first one - uh oh! at 12 something. By the last mile, it was 15 something!
Class Rank 29/42
Overall: 3044/3227

Now some data from my Garmin:
my average heart rate was 145
the average temperature was 37.4 degrees! (and remember pouring rain!)
10.4 mph average wind speed, 12.6 max

I am very happy with my time and pace. This may be hard for some of you to relate to because you are truly athletes, but I am satisfied.

I went to bed at 8:00 last night (and TiVo'd the Rockies game - yay!) I woke up at midnight in pain, so I ate a bowl of cereal and took some motrin. I went back to bed and slept until 6:00. I am really sore. My back hurts and my left knee hurts (and I am terrified of knee injuries.)

I am sure you haven't heard the last from me about this race, but I just wanted to post the data this morning.

And express my thanks to you. I have carried you guys with me on all my runs through this past 6 months or so. You have kept me going when I felt like quitting. I so appreciate the moral support, technical advice, and humor. Thanks!

Denver Marathon - Preliminary Report

Now that I have stopped shivering and shaking, I can type. This race was COLD. And I can handle cold, but combine cold and WET, and that is REALLY COLD. I was soaked to the skin, through and through. My feet have big honkin' blisters - from running in wet socks, in wet shoes.

Somehow I turned off my garmin for maybe a half a mile, so I have no idea what my time was and it is not posted yet. I believe I beat my time for my one and only other half-marathon. I really didn't expect to do that, but I felt great - aside from being cold.

At about 5 miles, I realized that I was never getting down to my short-sleeved shirt as I had planned, so I undid the safety pins on my bib and put them on my jacket. Unfortunately, I wore a big old cotton long-sleeved t-shirt over my short-sleeved shirt and under my jacket. I fully expected to take off the jacket, discard the old cotton t-shirt and tie the jacket around my waist! HA! That formula about temperatures feeling 20 degrees warmer during a race? That works when it isn't pouring rain. After a while, that cotton t-shirt was almost as long as my running skirt - because it was soaking wet. In other words, I looked like a dork - I won't expect to have a new profile picture from THIS race!

All that negative stuff aside - I really had a great time. I felt like I belonged in this race. That is a miraculous thing for me. My biggest enemies are always mental... I have met the enemy and she is looking back at me in the mirror! Today I didn't feel I had to struggle with that negative thinking. I just felt good to be out there with all the other freezing nuts.

When I saw the camaraderie the Leukemia & Lymphoma Team in Training had, I think I might have decided to join a running club... we shall see. They were kind enough to give me a garbage bag to wear for my first mile or so.

I will have more details later. I still feel kind of wacky.

Race Day!

I actually slept last night! The alarm actually woke me up! I actually feel good! I am looking forward to the race. It is 42 degrees. The high temp is supposed to be 45. It is supposed to rain. This should be great weather for a race.

I went to the Runner's Roost yesterday, and they were all so kind to help me figure out what to wear. As I left I told them I felt guilty about not buying anything, and they just laughed at me. What nice people.

I will give a report later in the day!

Wardrobe Malfunction?

We picked up our packets last night at the expo. I am very excited about the race. Very. I have many wardrobe issues, but I think I am going to head over to the running store as soon as I post this, eat a bowl of cereal, and take a bath. I have absolutely no idea about what to wear, so I am going to ask some people who might have a clue - who have run this race before and are familiar with local weather phenomena.

I took a 3 mile walk/run this morning - just to test my foot. My foot is absolutely fine. I had no pain whatsoever. I think not running for a week really helped me - even though I walked a fair bit this morning, my pace was right around what it normally is for running. I feel OK about the race. I am looking forward to it. I think the injury worked for me in 2 ways - physically, I got some rest I think I needed. Mentally, I realized I really really really want to run this race. I might have thought I was ambivalent before, but when told I couldn't do the race, I thought my heart would break. So no more wondering what the heck I am doing - I know what I am doing! I am running a race that I have trained for for months!

I got nervous when I read that this race has a 4 hour limit. When I read that they have a vehicle doing an 18 minute mile - or whatever that is, and you would be asked to leave the course if you weren't keeping up - it really frightened me. But If my slowest pace is 14 something - I should be fine.

Good Luck Randy and everyone else who has races this weekend!

An Abundance of Issues

The weather forecast has changed. Pretty drastically. I can deal with 49 degrees and rain, I just don't know what to wear! I talked to a couple of women at the expo tonight and they were still planning on wearing shorts. Shorts I can handle, but short sleeves? That doesn't sound good to me. Any advice from anyone? I am thinking of wearing my nylon jacket, and if it gets too hot, I can wrap it around my waist. I have done it a million times, it doesn't look great, but it isn't terribly uncomfortable.

I have decided to show up on Sunday morning and just try my best. My foot still isn't exactly right, but I can try to run the race. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work. The world will not end. But if I sit at home, it will hurt me terribly.

Any advice about running a race in 40 degrees and rain? Especially what to wear?

3 days

I am back to counting days. I woke up this morning and realized, as I stepped gingerly from my bed, that my foot hardly hurts at all. I think if I can just take care of it in the next 2 days, I will be able to participate in one way or another in Sunday's race.

I am so grateful for you bloggers. You are the absolutely only people who understand WHY I have been so upset. I kind of got over it a bit yesterday. Today I am feeling much better and I think I can just muster through... even if I walk the course.

After work tomorrow, my daughter and I will go and pick up our packets at the expo. She has not trained for this race and has decided that she will walk it. When I talked to her about not wanting to "throw in the towel," she said she not only wants to throw it, she is pissed at it, and she wants to burn it! And she is 28 years old! Oh my.

Now I will plant myself on the sofa and work on a pair of socks I am knitting... while icing my foot... and watching the Rockies!

Proportion

I have lost all sense of proportion - and I need to get it back, quick!

I went to see the workers' compensation doctor this morning. My foot is sprained. He advised me not to run a half-marathon on Sunday. When I started crying, he was surprised, to put it mildly. He told me I could do another one after my foot is healed. I cried and whined and told him it is so hard to train for a half-marathon, I don't ever want to do it again. The race is the reward for all of the hard work. No one but a runner would understand this. He looked at me like I was NUTS. He asked how much it cost to register - oh, not much, only $75. and months of running in the heat, in the rain, in the cold mornings, in the mud, and when I don't feel like it, when I have a headache and I am tired, and when I should be cleaning my house, or spending time with my family... that's all.

In other words - WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He finally said "Okay, if on Saturday it doesn't hurt AT ALL, try running around your block and if it doesn't hurt AT ALL, maybe, just maybe try running the half-marathon." But he still didn't think it was a good idea.

So I came back to work, ate the nutritious lunch that I packed for myself - and then I went and purchased a bag of vanilla creme cookies and a bag of chex vanilla strawberry yogurt evilness. And then I came back to my office and ate the entire two bags of crap (sorry to borrow your word Marcy.)

I called one of my friends to complain and he said "There's a war in Iraq." Like I don't know that! He was trying to suggest to me that there MAY be more important things in the world than if I get to run this race. I am just not there yet. In time, my sense of proportion will return, won't it?

Oh Dear...

If you are the praying type, please say a prayer for me.

I woke up this morning with a migraine. I went to work anyway. At noon, I fell down the stairs. I twisted my right foot... the foot that I broke in 1993. I was stunned and tried to kind of figure out whether I was hurt or not... I walked away and decided I couldn't possibly train for months for a half-marathon and get hurt 5 days before the race.

My foot hurts like hell. The good news is that it is not discolored or swollen. Some of the medical professionals at work told me to get home and RICE. (rest, ice, compression, and elevation) Of course, I went to the grocery store first, and then I went to get some new nail polish at Ulta, and then I went to Runner's Roost to get gu for the race - being the eternal optimist, I guess. The woman at Runner's Roost told me not to wear high heels anymore... I think I might finally be ready to take that advice. It certainly isn't the first time I have heard it, but I might be ready to listen now.

I could not run if I had to right now. But I don't have to right now, so I will practice at living in the moment and not projecting into the future. And I will eat my steak for dinner and plop my butt on the sofa, ice my foot and elevate it.

6 days

The training is over. The planning should be kicking into high gear. It looks like the weather will cooperate. I am just sickened over what happened in Chicago yesterday. How do you run out of water at the beginning of the race? I am so relieved to hear that Jess is OK. What a mess.

I don't have a good hydration/nutrition plan for this race. I have a bottle that I was planning on carrying watered down Powerade in... and I could refill the water at the water stations. I don't think I will have gel with me.

In my first, last (and only) half-marathon in May, I had gel, and also took gatorade at the water stations. By the middle of the race, I had a stomach ache. I have since learned that one should not combine sports drinks AND gel.

I seem to have gotten over my psychosis about this race. I am really looking forward to it, and particularly looking forward to it being over! What an attitude.

One Week

One week from now, I will be one hour + into my half-marathon. I will be enjoying myself and I will be about 2 hours away from being done with this. (really)

I have turned some kind of mental corner - and it is good. I had a thoroughly enjoyable run yesterday morning. 3 miles is a nice distance to run. I like this tapering stuff. I also like the cooler weather. I *think* I am suffering through runs in the winter when it is cold, but the truth is, I really would rather run in 20 degrees than 70 degrees.

So, my friends in Arizona - we can still remain friends through the next week of baseball, right?

October 5

I don't know what happened to this photo, but I spent the money to send it to myself, so I will use it! I had a glorious early morning autumn run this morning. The leaves of the cottonwood trees practically glow in the sun, they are so golden.

I think I am realizing that running is a form of psychosis. In our blogging community, we have all levels of runners - we all are stellar because we go out and do this thing - but some of us are really, really good. But nearly all of us do the same things... we discount our talent, or our effort, or our abilities. We say I ONLY ran such and such. I ran 5 million miles, but I was SLOW.

I am 9 days out from my half-marathon, and although I have trained appropriately and according to plan, I am wondering WHY I am even doing this. Surely I am not good enough. Surely I am so slow that walkers will pass me and I will drag across the finish line - humiliating myself with my extreme out-of-shapeness. Surely people along the route will marvel at this overweight elderly woman out there (in a skirt yet!) trying to run a half-marathon.

I loved reading John Bingham's article in Runner's World this month - " I am not a jogger". Written in response to the inane Pearl Izumi advertising campaign - insulting runners of all levels. Isn't it silly that we have to defend this?

Forgive me for my ravings this morning. I am tired of training. I am mainly tired of the things that my mind tells me. What the hell does it matter that I am slow, or that I am not rail-thin? I am a healthy woman who is capable of going out and running 13.1 miles. That is indeed miraculous for a woman who drank too much for too long, and smoked 2 packs a day for 25 years. Who has so much hardware surgically inserted into her neck that her X-ray looks like Frankenstein!

To hell with all of it! I am going to go out and rejoice in who I am today! And thank God for it!

12 days

This is a cell phone photo from today's early morning run. It was dark, it was cold, it was windy... in other words - it was wonderful! I ran a nice 3 miles. I head out of my house and run .95 miles for an elevation gain of 200+ feet. And it is slow. Then I get two miles to lose that 200 feet - those miles are fun!

I am in my taper weeks now. I am kind of enjoying them. Then last night I got this month's Runner's World magazine and they are now saying that tapering is not as good an idea as we all thought? Well, screw that!

I am tired of running. I hope that when this race is over, I will revise what I am doing with my running. I cannot possibly stop because I would gain 350 lbs. But I hope to go back to faster short distances as opposed to the lumbering heavy-weight slow long runs. I know I will miss them, but for now, I long to not be spending hours and hours each week running.